so much has happened already

lately i've really been enjoying tony. more so than usual. not saying i dont normally enjoy him, but i feel so overwhelmed with love towards him. it's a wonderful feeling! he's been off work for a week and a half and we've had a lot of time to hang out. usually we dont have a whole lot of time together.

tony started/finished the bathroom project this week. there are a couple small things that need to be finished but nothing crazy. maybe i'll post photos later. i really, REALLY like the bathroom now. it was so boring and plain (all white) before. now it's fun and bright!

the other day i got a call from the co owner of yoga studio. i'd talked to eric thru email in the past (he's the owner) and steve called me the other day. so while we were talking i think i was nervous and before i know it he set up a meeting with me on friday at 8:30 am and then his class after at 9:45. i hung up the phone thinking, holy shit, i'm taking a yoga class. what the hell!?! i've been really anxious ever since. completely freaking out. i've never done anything like this before. i've always worked out in the privacy of my own home. i went to a gym once for a few months but it was all women and it was dead so there was usually like three of us there. never any more than that so you didn't worry about anyone else. this is an actual class, all right next to each other. so. nervous.

i've always had a complex with people watching me. i hate buffet's because i dont like people watching me pick what food i'm eating. even a line of food at a family function makes me nervous if people are right there. granted, that has changed a bit...but i still won't go pick out food unless tony is right there next to me. when i started doing hair i was so uncomfortable with knowing that people were watching me. i couldn't think about anything else. and of course those feelings are gone now that i know what i am doing and i am confident.

i just really hope that everything goes well, that i dont get so nervous that i shake and can't hold the poses, or fart, or don't do something properly. this is what goes through my head. i just want everything to be perfect!

in other exciting news, t and i are going to nyc! a month or so ago i found out that tim burton had an exhibit until april and i've been trying to come up with a way to go. forget all the details, we figured it out and are going! staying in a hostel (which i'm excited about) eating great vegan food! i can not wait!! we haven't been back since out honeymoon two and a half years ago. should be amazing!

here's to looking forward to 2010!! this is the year of making it happen! :)

christmas

i feel like christmas came too soon. and it was over just as fast. unfortunately the snow is coming NOW (we had rain and slush for christmas). regardless, it's been a good, nice, long weekend.

we spent the day with my family on xmas eve. at my mom's in the morning and my aunt and uncle's in the evening. it was hard in the evening, with my grandpa not there. everyone felt it as well. there was a good amount of crying but i'm glad that everyone got to be there for eachother. i actually had a lot of negative things to say but i'll just bypass that. but i think i will say that i would be very ok with it just being our immediate family next year.

every year my dad gets my mom bras and underware. it's seriously tradition now and i feel like if he ever went outside of that box we could all suffer heart attacks!

note to self: get tony a buzz lightyear for christmas next year. he seemed way too into it! hah

family tradition: shots of "holy water". i believe that was the last bottle my dad had from his dad? maybe, maybe not. either way, everyone took a shot. (well, i didn't. but i never do. shit's strong!!)

hope everyone had a very lovely holiday!

i think that paulo coelho is incredible

"we have to try to get rid of the notion of time. and when you have an intense contact of love with nature or another human being, like a spark, then you understand that there is no time and that everything is eternal."

-paulo coelho

today tony took a ton of stuff to the salvation army. not as much as last year, but close! in the pile of things was my old red luggage. that luggage has been everywhere with me. it's a little beat but still very usable. and i hope that no one minds it's an incomplete set...i figured it was time to get rid of it. a part of me has held on for it for too long.

and there will always be a piece missing.

i can't believe it's almost christmas!

once things calm down a bit i think i'm going to do a year in photos. just of things i have done, good memories and whatnot. until then, this is what i have been up to the past few weeks!

hat shopping! why it is soooo huge i will never know!

looks like dexter didn't want to be in the corner :)

the clouds were CRAZY the other night. so pretty out.

tony finished the shed. now our scooters have a nice home for the winter!

i caught shorty "standing around" yesterday. literally.

this week is going to be a busy one. probably more so than last week even. it's good, i'm not complaining, but i feel like a vacation is in order!

happy holidays!!

realization

something i just realized:

you can't be a teacher unless someone wants to be taught.

why this took so long for me to figure out i'll never know, but i'm glad i know now.

more good

so, i have continued my communication with eric. i have decided to apply for this life training class because it sounds amazing and i feel like i am meant to do it at this point in my life. it's literally RIGHT before i leave for europe but i figure if it's meant to be, it will be...

eric has given me a new light in my heart and i'm excited to see where this all takes me.

i also just read the alchemist by paulo coelho and i feel like i'm getting signs to go ahead with everything.

i've been having amazing workouts too. i think i'm going to buck up and just start going to an actual class. probably not until january when i've got some more time to dedicate to going. it's not cheap, after all!

wish me luck!

the day has turned around

i have been having a bad day. i haven't been feeling the best physically.

and mentally i'm exhausted.

i feel hopeless and uninspired.

or i should say, felt.

this morning i was thinking about how grateful i am that i found xflowsion. it's dvd workouts that are yoga based. because of xflowsion i was able to get my ass in gear and continue to work out and feel great. and the words of the creator, eric paskel motivates me every time he talks. (even though i hear the same thing over and over!)

anyway, this morning i was thinking about it and i decided to write him an email thanking him for his words and inspiration etc etc. and i just got an email back.

i seriously feel like i'm about to have a heart attack. freaking the fuck out, really! i've just gone through a huge range of emotions and i have excitement and anxiety running through my veins.

and just so i never forget the correspondence, here is it. not for anyone but for me.

i really hope that you are the real eric paskel from xflowsion and that you can accept my thanks!

to make a long story short, i had been having some health problems for years and my diagnosis caused me to change my eating habits and change my life. a few months ago i was about to turn 30. i woke up 30 days before my birthday and i said "i need to start working out". i had changed everything in my life minus my activity level. i have always hated working out and never able to stick to anything.

so 30 days before i turned 30 i made a promise to myself to work out EVERY DAY until my birthday. and i did it because of you guys and xflowsion!

it's been over a month since and i have continued to work out at least five days a week.

i am so grateful for your strength and encouraging words.

thank you a thousand times for helping people along a path of health, wellness, and for making an amazing workout video. i can only hope there is more to come!

from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU!

in joy,
lisa

WOW! how wonderful... i am so happy to hear your story and would love to hear more. we are all in this together, you are not alone my friend. i will keep doing my part and you keep doing yours and together not only will we save our own asses but i am sure we will help some others as well. where do you live? i travel alot to teach and may be in an area near you and of course i would love you to come to michigan or LA where i have our Yoga Shelter studio's. check out www.yogashelter.com Our april 15th Life Training course has your name written all over it. dont let the finances be an issue if things are tight, we will help. stay in touch and tell me more. peace, EP by the way this is the real Eric Paskel HA...

i really want to find out more about this life training course. it's right before i leave for czech but i feel like it's happening when it is for a reason. and i really, really want to go.

i can't wait! thank you eric, again, for giving me some hope!!

christmas lights!

tony and i put up the tree and lights all over the house. and i wrapped all the presents this morning.

he was real excited. obviously.

the bathroom: i cannot wait to take a bath with just these lights on!
this is the blue room. we spend most of our time in here relaxing:
i looove this time of year!


see the finished tree here!

i can tell it's december...it's getting cold..

...and i'm totally and completely uninspired.

my 365 blog was helping with that for a bit, but now i feel like i'm boring. my days pretty much run together...working at the salon...doing yoga...eating...i don't have much time for anything else. things i used to enjoy don't add any warm feelings anymore. i feel lackluster. i feel tired.

i feel cold.

i usually get like this in the winter time. it didn't come as fast this year because we had warmer weather up until a week ago. i dream of being at a beach with the sun on my face. ft. lauderdale florida was 80 yesterday!

i need something to get me through this winter. it's supposed to snow tomorrow. as much as i love the first snow i just don't feel like i'm ready for it yet. it just means there is more to come. and just because i love the FIRST snow doesn't mean i love snow...

i'd really like to put the christmas tree up. listen to christmas music, wrap presents, and light cinnamon candles. hopefully i can convince tony to do this with me soon. maybe that will help cheer me up.

either way, i feel like i took a hard dive downward and i don't feel like getting up again. it's probably the worst feeling in the world.

i guess the only thing i can do is keep trying..

get some motivation!

the past two weeks i have been slacking on my yoga. i went from working out seven days a week to four days a week, and it shows in my attitude.

so i'm back on it today. i worked out and if felt so good. and i feel so much more at ease. lets hope i start sleeping better again..

i feel like i've been so busy lately and the weather is starting to get bad and i'm really dreading winter. i can't seem to get warm at work or at home, and it makes me very uncomfortable.

and somehow someone got my credit card number and charged things and my cc company said they were taking care of it but they haven't taken one of the charges off of it...*sigh*. i guess i should call them...

i'm keeping my fingers crossed that today is going to be a good day..

today will be a good day.

bringin back the past...and snail mail!

i would like a pen pal.

any takers???

:D

oh yeah, my tattoo!

it's finished and healed. i think it turned out beautiful!

tired

so.

a couple weeks ago i did that gallbladder cleanse.

basically i've been feeling like crap ever since. the past two days i've had a sharp pain in my stomach. then at work yesterday i felt like i was going to pass out/barf. i got bad indigestion, and i felt like i had a fever.

i looked it up and it sounds like i am either trying to pass more gallstones or i have one stuck or something like that. i was nervous because i knew something wasn't right.

anyway, i talked to my doctor this morning and she seemed urgent and said that i needed to do another gallbladder cleanse now to get out whatever is stuck.

more nerves.

i dont wanna do it.

but i also dont want to keep feeling like this. i guess i have to finish what i started.

I WILL BE OK!

today was amazing

i dont even have time to get into it right now, but so much greatness happened in my little world.
hopefully i'll have time to sit down this weekend and really get to appreciate all that has happened and all that i have.

this is really what love is!

i think this is so beautiful

it's been a fulfilling past few weeks!

i dont even know where to begin!

i always hate seeing someone you haven't seen in a long time and trying to answer the question: so what's new?

there is always sooo much to say but really, never enough time to say it. plus i always figure (maybe it's my own fears) that the person doesn't really want to hear what all is new.

anyway, i've been crazy busy and i wish i had more time to blog. but really, i think enjoying life is just as good!

i ordered a couple cds from gregory page. normally i would just order through amazon or something. i guess it's just easier i dont know. although i would rather just support the "little guy". anyway, to my surprise he added notes to both of my cds:

i like when people you support add a personal touch. it makes it feel more like a friendly exchange rather than just buying something.

also, i completely forgot to mention this before. remember when i talked about starting to work out daily? well, i did it! i worked out every day from sept 23rd to oct 23rd.


the smiley faces mean i worked out. anyway, i've still been working out daily. and i feel great and my body is changing and i'm becoming stronger and more flexible. it's incredible, really. i'm very excited and proud of myself for sticking through with this. it's been a long road, but i finally found something i love to do. i've missed a couple days here and there..but for good reason. once for a cleanse i did and i wasn't feeling good that day, and a couple days when i got tattooed. (speaking of which, i finally got my hip piece done! and it looks amazing. i will have to take a photo.) so the plan is to continue what i'm doing. minus probably saturdays. i like to work out in the morning when i wake up and i get up way too early saturday to do that. either way, working out/yoga is in my life forever and that makes me happy!

ending on a sweet note...i bought some delicious looking raspberries at the store yesterday. they were huge and probably the best berries i have ever had.

yum. anyway, i probably have way more to write but i'm getting tired because work was busy today. i've done so much lately i think tomorrow i'm just going to relax. well, after i finish some paperwork for work. :)

i love fall...and other random things

this is pretty much how everything looks right now and i love it!

this place used to be a chinese restaurant. super gross and weird that it's obgyn now!

cory wanted me to do his makeup for halloween and gave me the following two pictures for inspiration.

this is what it ended up looking like:
i think it turned out really good! obviously not perfect but we were happy with it.

and the same nite tony decided to shave his beard which is always fun. because things like this happen:

hope everyone had a happy halloween!

gallbladder cleanse

so i'm in the process of doing a cleanse and i hate it.

six days of 32 oz of apple juice. maybe this doesn't sound bad to anyone else but i dont have any sweetener anymore. let alone any fruit (minus berries. and berries aren't that sweet). so my tummy has been a bit upset all week because of the added sugar i'm not used to.

then last nite i had to drink 2 6oz glasses of epsom salt water. which is probably the most revolting thing i have ever had in my mouth. finish that off with my usual 3oz olive oil mixed with oj and i was set! ugh. normally i can't get the oil down all that great but it was super easy after the epsom salts!

this morning upon waking at 7am i had to drink more epsom salts. then again at 9 i have my last glass. i dunno if i can force that last glass down...

my tummy is making weird noises. but i do think i passed gallstones. there were tons of pebble looking things. some as big as peas. i have heard after three of these cleanses it's possible to pass some that are golf ball sized! i really dont want to do another one they are so gross....

anyway i go at 11 to get my colonic and clear some more out. i have a feeling i'm not going to be feeling up to doing much today! :(

i am not in the mood for people's shit today

FUCK TODAY.