...instead of feeling guilty for eating a lot this week i should be grateful that i have food. happy that my body is telling me it needs nourishment.

...instead of not working out yesterday and not feeling like working out today, i should be ok with my body wanting a break.

...instead of feeling frustrated that i haven't been able to make it to an actual yoga class in over a week because of the dogs and my schedule, i should be excited for next week when i know i'll be back on track again.

...instead of being jealous that other people are open and doing what they want i should let myself go and be free.

...instead of beating myself up over my past decisions i should relax and be ok with the fact that i am not perfect. no one is perfect. but we are all perfect where we are at right now.


skip ahead

i know that i am bypassing all the excitement of my trip. but honestly it feels like forever go.

i really did love it there and many times i wish i was back. i loved being with my family, staying in the family house, and living self-sufficiently and simply. i think i would lose all that i have just to go back to that. i feel the stresses of my life here are really taking it's toll and i have had a really hard time readjusting.

without getting too much into that i have a bit of info that i found interesting.

yesterday i was asked to do hair for a photoshoot. it's for a magazine that apparently gets distributed to the "rich and famous, all over the world". places like london, ny, dubai, paris, etc. i would be styling the hair for a cover shoot...and her outfit would be a body painted gown. sounds amazing and glamorous and exciting. and sure, maybe it would be kind of cool to have my craft associated with that.

i ended up turning it down. i say it's because i have to stay and watch these silly dogs (they both had surgery last week) but maybe i'm using that as an excuse. i really, honestly don't have any desire to work on things like that. being famous. having my name in the light (or my hair hah). i don't do hair to become famous. i do hair because i love it. i love to make people feel beautiful. so yes, i turned down the gig. i emailed the makeup artist and she responded with: "Worldwide exposure and magazine credits are something we all strive for."


those things are just not important to me. yes, maybe at first it'd be "cool" to say "i did the hair for that magazine cover" but that has nothing to do with ME. maybe people would be envious or whatever but what difference does that all make? me getting my work on the cover of a magazine isn't going to change anything. it wont make the world a better place, it wont make people stop using plastic bottles or plastic bags, and it certainly wont make people think before they act. and to me, those things are more important than being popular.

i guess i was just a little shocked that she said that. i strive to make my clients happy. to make them feel good about themselves. to make them leave my chair feeling confident and beautiful. period.