12.02.2009

i can tell it's december...it's getting cold..

...and i'm totally and completely uninspired.

my 365 blog was helping with that for a bit, but now i feel like i'm boring. my days pretty much run together...working at the salon...doing yoga...eating...i don't have much time for anything else. things i used to enjoy don't add any warm feelings anymore. i feel lackluster. i feel tired.

i feel cold.

i usually get like this in the winter time. it didn't come as fast this year because we had warmer weather up until a week ago. i dream of being at a beach with the sun on my face. ft. lauderdale florida was 80 yesterday!

i need something to get me through this winter. it's supposed to snow tomorrow. as much as i love the first snow i just don't feel like i'm ready for it yet. it just means there is more to come. and just because i love the FIRST snow doesn't mean i love snow...

i'd really like to put the christmas tree up. listen to christmas music, wrap presents, and light cinnamon candles. hopefully i can convince tony to do this with me soon. maybe that will help cheer me up.

either way, i feel like i took a hard dive downward and i don't feel like getting up again. it's probably the worst feeling in the world.

i guess the only thing i can do is keep trying..