two

two years ago today, i made a decision to change my life. see here.

a month before my 30th birthday, i vowed to take better care of myself physically. in the end, it turned out i would take better care of myself mentally and emotionally as well.

in december, after a series of events, (see here) i ended up at the yoga shelter.

in april, after more events, i ended up at life training (short comment here).

since may 2010, many things have happened. many things have changed. i disconnected from my yoga shelter family (and i do still consider them my family, although connection has been lost).

i have taken many "wrong" (what is wrong, anyway???) turns and ended up in places i never thought i'd be. i have faced ups and downs, flips and turns and inside-outs. for a long while i had abandoned what i knew and faced depression, frustration, and sadness because of it.

and now, here i am, two years after my first promise to myself. to take better care of myself. i did great for a while and horrible for a longer while. but i'm ready to get back in the game.

this week has been eye opening and many realizations have happened. and i cant just sit in the stands and expect life to be exciting and what i want.

i have one month until my 32nd birthday. and although i wont do things the same this time around, i do plan on making a promise to myself.

something i learned at life training was that i am indeed good enough. i struggle with that still but i'm so sick of feeling sorry for myself and not being happy and enjoying what i do have, because i have a lot.

so friends, from here on out i will make a promise to myself that for 30 days i will be grateful, thankful, joyful and happy. and most importantly, i will be true to myself. i am who i am for a reason.

i know that things dont happen overnight, so i must be patient with myself, but what it comes down to is i want to be happy.

i want to be happy.
which has been my original goal all along.

and i would have never gotten this far if it weren't for eric and lisa paskel. they probably dont even know it, but their words stay with me always. just because i'm not on the mat with them, doesn't mean i don't soak in their teachings.

love love